“Suicidal glory is the luxury of the irresponsible. We're not giving up. We're waiting for a better opportunity to win.”
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" I don't think I've ever met a Liberal whom I didn't like on a personal basis. That said, if your goal is to change minds and influence people, it's probably not a good idea to begin by asserting that virtually all elected Democrats are liars. But what the hell."
I was looking for something else when I ran into this post I did on FreeRepublic in 2000. I still like it.
Six of 50 -- and some more
Getting passed around Capitol Hill are "50
Things You Can Do to Annoy the Politically Correct" by Edward Mick.
There's not space to fit all 50, but here's a six-pack:
1) Keep a framed photo of Oliver North on
your desk at work.
2) Launch a petition drive to carve Ronald
Reagan's visage into Mount Rushmore.
3) Your Christmas card? A photo of you shaking
hands with Newt Gingrich.
4) Buy a gun . . .
5) . . . as a present for your 10-year-old
. . .
6) . . . to celebrate his Junior NRA Membership.
I don't have Mick's other 44, but these are guaranteed to do the
job:
Tell the one about three queers in the swimming pool at the office party
Brag that you buy discount cigarettes from an Indian reservation
Mention that Hillary Clinton looks like a bull dyke at the next PTA meeting
Complain about all the parking spaces that are reserved for "crips."
Tell a group of your wife's friends that women in the military are
as useless as "tits on a boar."
Brag that you don't recycle because it costs more in energy then it saves
Put a "Joe McCarthy died for our sins" bumper sticker on your car.
Mention that you think no woman really means "stop."
Groan loudly at your kids graduation when the liberal guest speaker is
introduced
Tell people that the Erin Brocovitch case was based on bad science
When the guy on TV whines about his wife dying from lung cancer after smoking
for 10 years, yell "so what did she expect, big boobs?"
Use "negro."
Put a Boy Scout decal on your car window.
Put a "Go Stanford Indians" bumper sticker on your car.
Mention that you thought Marge Schott was a hoot
Use "anno Domini," liberally in your writing
Opine that Scientologists are a bunch of grifters
Write a letter to your local paper saying you're sick and tired of the
government giving money to Israel
Ask a woman on the subway, "Say, I missed Rush Limbaugh today. Anything
good happen?"
Begin your argument, "I read in the Washington Times ..."
Ask your guests if they'd like to see your video, "The Clinton Chronicles"
Quote Jerry Falwell
Mention that you're carrying on a correspondence with Timothy McVeigh
Tell neighbors you bought your wife a pistol for her anniversary present
Bless yourself (make the sign of the cross) in a restaurant
Ask the librarian why they don't have The American Spectator
Brag that your dad dropped over 100 tons of bombs on Hanoi during the war
Tell your friends at school that global warming is a bunch of crap
Tell friends you never respected Andrew Dice Clay after he broke down on
Arsenio
Use Rush Limbaugh as a source
Brag that you don't use condoms because men never get AIDS from heterosexual
sex
Claim that "second hand smoke" is phony science dreamed up by tort lawyers
Use the bumper sticker "Vote Lazio -- women belong in the kitchen" for
your next New York visit.
If you wanted them so bad, why didn;t you try google? It took me 15 seconds. Here they are in all their profound glory. They need to be updated though. Jeremy aka judgejerry23001@yahoo.com 50 Things You Can Do To Annoy The Politically Correct: 1) For your next house party, make a big pot of Endangered Species Stew. 2) Wear a Confederate Flag pin on your lapel. 3) Give out candy cigarettes on Halloween. 4) Give out REAL cigarettes on Halloween. 5) Keep a framed photo of Oliver North on your desk at work. 6) Call a bum a bum. 7) Wear Nike gym shoes. 8) Launch a petition drive to carve Ronald Reagan?s visage into Mt. Rushmore. 9) Litter�. 10) �on Earth Day. 11) Advocate a nuclear first strike against Canada� 12) As justification, offer the fact that Canada has Socialized Medicine. 13) Drink Coors Beer 14) Consume Conspicuously 15) Tell this joke: ?Tom Daschle, Hillary Clinton, and Al Gore are in a life raft, but there are only enough provisions for one. Who gets saved? Answer: The country 16) Cross a picket line. 17) Throw a party to celebrate the execution of a notorious murderer. 18) When they flip the switch, lead the crowd in a chorus of: ?na-na-na-na, hey-hey.? 19) Spurn recycling. 20) Wear a Washington Redskins jersey�. 21) ���accessorized by your Cleveland Indians baseball cap. 22) Buy a gun� 23) �as a present for your 10 year old� 24) �to celebrate his Junior NRA Membership. 25) Drain a wetland. 26) Drive a gas guzzling SUV�. 27) �..with a ?Pave the Rainforests? bumper sticker. 28) Smoke� 29) �a big, smelly cigar� 30) �in the no smoking section�. 31) �.on the day of The Great American Smokeout 32) Express profound admiration for Richard Nixon. 33) Wear fur. 34) Eat meat - especially veal. 35) Say that while you believe it should be matter of personal choice, you are ?personally opposed? to vegetarianism. 36) Attend boxing matches. 37) Refer to an adult woman as a ?girl.? 38) Take every possible tax deduction�.and then some. 39) Contribute money to the Jessie Helms Senatorial Campaign 40) Suggest that the poor are undertaxed. 41) Recommend deportation to Cuba as a solution to ?The Homeless Problem.? 42) Say you were just kidding. Then recommend work camps instead. 43) Hunt. 44) Watch Fox News. 45) Harm animals in the making of your movie. 46) Harm liberal actors in the making of your movie. 47) Listen to Dr. Laura. 48) When Janet Reno?s name is mentioned say: ?Janet is sure a funny name for a guy.? 49) Drill for oil in your back yard. 50) Give away Ann Coulter?s new book, "Slander," to friends as Christmas presents.
1) You think that protestors outside nuclear power plants are dedicated activists, but protestors outside abortion clinics are dangerous zealots interfering with a legal activity.
2) You believe that even though the top 20 percent of taxpayers pay 80 percent of income taxes, that the rich are not paying their fair share.
3) You believe in global warming today just as firmly as you believed in global cooling back in the 1970s.
4) You mentally subtract 100 points from someone's IQ if the person speaks with a Southern accent.
5) You are dedicated to helping the poor, the downtrodden and the less fortunate, but you have never given blood.
6) You have no problem with Hollywood movie stars flying around in private jets to give speeches on the evils of SUVs.
7) You deplore prejudice and bigotry in all its forms, but think that everyone in the "red states"? is an idiot.
8) You are worried about how the French view Americans.
9) You believe that nativity scenes should be banned from public view, but that anyone objecting to pornography only has to look the other way.
ALso an updatd version at : http://revealedtruth.blogspot.com/2005_01_02_revealedtruth_archive.html#110490607586379468
1) At your next house party, serve a big pot of Endangered Species Stew. 2) Give out candy cigarettes on Halloween. 3) Give out REAL cigarettes on Halloween. 4) Keep a framed photo of John Ashcroft on your desk at work. 5) Complain that the poor don't pay their fair share of the tax burden. 6) Call a homeless person a �bum.� 7) Wear Nike gym shoes. 8) Drive a gas-guzzling SUV (preferably a Hummer).... 9) ....with a �Pave the Rainforests� bumper sticker.... 10) ........and a Jesus Fish on the trunk. 11) Advocate a nuclear first strike against Canada. 12) As justification, offer the fact that Canada has Socialized Medicine. 13) Consume Conspicuously. 14) Tell this joke: �John Kerry, Hillary Clinton, and Al Sharpton are in a life raft, but there are only enough provisions for one person. Who gets saved?� Answer: �The country� 15) Cross a picket line. 16) Express wonderment that Ann Coulter has never been nominated for a Nobel Prize. 17) Throw a party to celebrate the execution of a notorious murderer. 18) When they flip the switch, lead the crowd in a chorus of: �na-na-na-na, hey-hey, good-bye� 19) Give The Passion of the Christ DVD to friends on their birthdays. 20) Wear a Washington Redskins jersey.... 21) ....accessorized by your Cleveland Indians baseball cap.... 22) ........to a NASCAR race. 23) Drain a wetland. 24) Harm animals in the making of your movie. 25) Harm left-wing actors in the making of your movie. 26) Buy a gun.... 27) ....as a present for your 10 year old... 28) ........to celebrate his Junior NRA Membership. 29) Wear a Confederate Flag pin on your lapel. 30) Start a petition drive to add Ronald Reagan's visage to Mount Rushmore 31) Smoke a big, smelly cigar.... 32) ....in the no smoking section.... 33) ........on the day of The Great American Smokeout. 34) Wear fur. 35) Eat meat - especially veal. 36) Say that while you believe it should be matter of personal choice, you are �personally opposed� to vegetarianism. 37) Walk around your office sipping from an "I Love Halliburton" coffee mug. 38) Refer to an adult woman as a �girl.� 39) Brag about how much money you saved due to the Bush tax cuts. 40) Then say that you contributed your savings to the Tom Delay Campaign. 41) Drink Coors beer. 42) Recommend deportation to Cuba as a solution to The Homeless Problem. 43) Say you were just kidding. Then recommend work camps instead. 44) Hunt.... 45) ....for doves. 46) Watch Fox News. 47) When Janet Reno�s name is mentioned say: �Janet is sure a funny name for a guy.� 48) Attend George W. Bush's second inauguration. 49) Tape it and distribute copies widely. 50) Recount the story of your trip over and over. And when you're done.... 51) Weep tears of joy!
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